living with an 'invisible - dis'ability'

As I'm Living with Anaphylaxis' to Latex'
proteins' & with many' food' allergies'
asthma' plus 'the chemical' sensitivity'

What is my life like, with this kind of dis-ability, being so hyper-allergic ? 

                   

                           

                  

                      ... ITS JUST TO BE, AND TO LIVE POSITIVE, AND ...

 

                                        YET THAT CAN BE DIFFICULT

                                                                                    

                              SO LOVING YOUR LIFE NO MATTER WHAT.     

                     FOR LIFE, IS SO MUCH MORE, THAN WE NOW; KNOW.

                Life; is for living and its for knowing; who you/I/we truly are.   

 

LIFE IS GREAT BE IN IT  AND DO LIVE IN 

                              )O(           

       YOUR LIFE; ALWAYS; BEING AWARE

                                                        

                 >>> the difficulties of our latex & chemical-allergies <<<

                               ALL IS EXAMPLES OF COPING WITH THIS

               WE ARE SO MANY NOW WITH MANY, MANY KIND OF ALLERGIES                           

                 WE TOO WANT TO LIVE!     

    

            I WOULD LIKE, TO SAY TO YOU; LIVE YOUR LIFE FULLY, LIVE IT WELL

                           AND JUST APPRECIATE ALL THAT YOU HAVE,

            FOR, YOUR LIFE TOO, CAN SUDDENLY BECOME, SO VERY DIFFERENT.

 

         

 

                                             ... PLEASE HELP ME ...

                                    PLUS MANY, MANY OTHERS TOO

                             GIVE THESE HELPING HANDS, TO OTHERS

                                    BY SPREADING THIS KNOWLEDGE

 

                             

 

                     as many people, now encounters big changes in life.

                           >>>here is other latex victims stories<<<

                           >>>rubber gloves born and bandished<<<

                               

                                                

 

                If IT' becomes 'turned upside down' or 'inside out' suddenly'

                fears' raise its heads in so many situations & in all our lives

                         just, like this; my own anaphylaxis, did for me,

                                            ...yet; fear is fear:...

 

                                          

 

                                 ...but only; if we let it; take hold...

                                              ♥ inside of us ♥

                                 ...then, it turns around to panic...

 

                       

 

                            ...and that can come through everything...

                                         ◊ when we start to react ◊

                                   ...for that; not to happen; think...

 

                                             

                                                now; thinker-re'think

 

                                                             

                                                                  or start to pray

 

                                                

 

                                                   AT LEAST;  BREATHE; so just

                                       stop, and feel your breath

                                                      if feeling; 'panicy' breathe be

                                                        aware, of your own breath

                                                         it will help you stay calm

                                                          if you've a panic attack

 

                                                     

 

                                          so you are aware; of yourself

                                   know how your body reacts, in all details                                    

                                      as we must learn, what it is, and what; we can do.

 

                                                                      

 

                                                                       yet

                                                     be aware of anaphylaxis shock       

                                                        

                                                            

                                                and know; your own; allergy reactions                                   

                                                   know any anaphyaxis; is different

                                               anaphylaxis can mean Death in minutes

                                                    we must use our rescue medication

 

                                              

 

                                    if it is a beginning Anaphylaxis you will need instant help

                                                         FOR 

                       Is an anaphylaxis different; from any other 'disease ?

                                                  ...YES, IT IS...   

            Anaphylaxis is a defense, of/in almost all the species; living on Earth;

                         its a brilliant and an incredible protection; of LIFE.

                     Its a defense from cells, not to become altered or sick.

                           Its a defense of/for; the survival of the species.

 

                                        

 

                                  THE BODY IS GOING INTO; SHOCK.

                                      it needs; a rescue medication  

                                  OTHER'WISE IT CAN BE THE DEATH. 

 

                               

 

                          IT CAN BECOME AN EMERGENCY; SO FAST

                     ( our bodies, can go into many kinds; of shock )           

                           ITS A BUILD'IN PROTECTION; IN OUR DNA

                                             

                           yet can trigger, even freeze, our bodies

                   for it is going into full fear/fight for our survival,

                it is quickly or slowly closing our bodies/organs down, 

                   trying to have you survive, it is an important part

                         of this our human or animal genome too.

 

                                    

 

                           IT JUST SHOW HOW RESILIENT WE ALL ARE

                           IT HAS BEEN; WITH US, A LONG TIME, TOO

                           IT HARDLY CHANGED A THOUSAND YEARS 

                           IT HAS NOW, GONE OUT OF OUR CONTROL

                           IT NEEDS TO BE CALMED DOWN, IN US ALL

 

                                              

 

                             as it react; against the perils; of adulteration.

                                    it was made to help us all to survive

                                            Its written into our DNA

                                              It's the story of Earth

                                                so listen and see,

                                            see it, in all the colors

                                           it has been; written down

                                    see it through-out all the shadows

                             as it is coded and ready to protect our bodies

 

                                  

 

                                     so please; do not be afraid, now

                                            learn to live with it all

 

                                                  

 

                                           not; in panic or fear

                                              ... be wise and ...

                           'instead see how fine'tuned it all truly is'

                       do not become afraid; become aware and care      

                           'this is the big warning sign for everyone' 

                                                YES DO KNOW

                                             its a danger for us

                                          it comes as a lightning

                                    in our lives as over'protecting

                                 yes, its known; its very 'OLD' news  

                            'This is also why; I write this for you, now'

                        do not live; by default but by inner will & power.

                    Do not become fearful, be informed to protect all life

                                

                                            

                          

            ( A part; taken from; Nobel Lectures; Physiology or Medicine, 1901-1921)

                                  By: Charles Richet; Research of Anaphylaxis. 

            Yes, it is a long time ago, yet that is exactly, what has happened here too.

                              *  YOU CAN ALSO FIND THE FULL LECTURE, ON 'MY LINK PAGE'   *                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

                                                   

                                                                                        

                                                                      ABOUT ANAPHYLAXIS ONLY

                                                                           I'll quote here in part:                                  

   'We are so constituted that we can never recieve other proteins into the blood than

     those that has been modified by digestive juices Every time an alien or changed

     protein penetrates: by effraction the organism suffers and becomes resistant, this

     resistance; lies in an increased sensitivity, like a sort of revolt, against the second

     parenteral injection, which would be fatal.  At this second injection, this organism

     'mans' its defense and answers by the anaphylaxis shock ridding it of the altered'.

               ( or by a sacrifice of one single organisme; or LIFE, for the benefit of the many's survival?  ) 

                                                                 ♦    

                                       ( know, a virus operate different in our bodies )

       It clearly stats a protein; coming through; skin, lungs or mucus membranes is

       at risk, by our body revolt as anaphylaxis, a huge fight back; will start up' in us.

       It is also precisely, in these areas our allergies starts up where cells' re'act from.

       What kind of altered proteins? can/do penetrate your body from these your own

                                                   daily surroundings.

       So many cells are involved in this, its not simple at all. Its like a maze inside us.

       Every organ; has its job and cells are sometimes answering, to many voices' too.

       Again, please do not become frightened, do know facts proper, and stand up for 

       yourself, do not take everything as face-value, and do not believe; in everything.

 

         

 

                             KNOW WHAT IS IN YOU AND AROUND YOU TOO.

       Now think of all these new materials we have around us (that is not eatable too)

       All our tissues that comes in contact with 'the outer world' has these protective

                                     cells, ready to protect us, immediately

       This is why I say everyone is at risk, and not only by using latex, its all proteins

       as these are blended into/with all forms of chemicals too; just like latex gloves.

       Protection in us breaks down get spoiled and things starts to go horrible wrong

       we can react as a direct irritation. When outer chemicals do release the reaction.

       Any 'body'irritation will release; body chemicals throughout/into all our tissues.

       Some reactions goes one way, attacking our own cells, others overprotect them.

       Why ? do we not ever stop up, and truly see what it is, we do; to our own bodies.

       ITS ABOUT; THE TOO LITTLE IS NOT ENOUGH; AND TOO MUCH WILL SPILL OVER.

 

                                  

 

                      ( surely, we do not have to keep acting like this, in our lives)

       We just have to open our eyes and see, listen to the nature and speak our truth. 

                                                              ♥♥♥               

     How do we know? If all new; or man'made molecules in any 'New' changed food

     arriving onto our platter is/isn't proper tested & no warnings; that it has not been.

                              What can/will be modified by; our digestive juices?

                           What about all of these new kinds of materials we use?

                      WHAT IS AROUND US ALL ? WHAT DO WE NEED, TO CHANGE ?

                                                                 ♥

               WHY IS ALL ALLERGIES; NOW MARCHING AHEAD; LIKE NEVER BEFORE ?

                                               (there are still so many why's)

                                                                 ♥

        All of this seems to have been forgotten; by all these sciences we have on Earth 

        I do appeal; to all of our scientists, to please; re-view what it is; you all now do.

                                                               ◊◊◊

        Which of these new (altered) proteins, or even chemicals, is not being; modified

        by our digestive juices, what has changed; our world so much around lately too?

                                                               ◊◊◊

        This was written, before we changed; 'every molecule' around & throughout it all,

        by refraction, penetration; through skin or other means; into a body: It; do learn.

                                                               ◊◊◊

        So what do not 'kill off ' or diminish our immune system, make it much stronger

        yet it makes it so strong, that it is ready to kill us too, so no more harm is done.

                                                                 ♥

        Here I'm not saying we start to eat everything either, to try and become immune.

        Let that be something great these scientists find a mechanism to sort out for all.                                 

                                                              

                                          SO, WHAT HAVE WE ALL LEARNED?

                                                WHAT IS; A TRUE 'ADULT'ERATION'?

                                                                 WHAT IS; A EFFRACTION IN US?

                                                                   WHAT IS; CHANGING FOODS?

                                                                     WHAT IS; A PROTECTION?

                                                                      WHAT IS; IN'RICHMENT?

                                                                       WHAT IS; SO HEALTHY?

                                                                       WHAT IS IT TO LEARN?

                                                                       WHAT IS; DANGEROUS?

                                                                       WHAT IS; AN ADDITIVE?

                                                                       WHAT IS; A MISLEADING?

                                                                     WHAT IS; THE TRUE FACTS?

                                                                    WHAT IS; CHANGING THINGS?

                                                                   WHAT IS; THIS GM FOOD, NOW?

                                                                WHAT IS; AN ADULTERATION, NOW?

                                          IS IT ALL, TURNED IN-SIDE AND OUT?

                                                                     

                                        Do we know what we are doing at all?                                                                      

                                                               FOR

                           other'wise; we are all being caught, mis'treated as

 

                               

 

                  the other side of all this; is our weakened immune system.

         (and they are both as bad as each other to live with; they make us sick)

                 Just, like all our lives become, when turned; up-side down.   

 

                        

 

           ...or Protecting us by: IGA,IGE,IGG,IGM, T'cells...all Defending us...

                                              TH'1 < >  < > TH'2

 

               

 

                                    -and-in-side-too-then-to-out-

            ...they're like a chain of cells, and they do start; a chain'reaction...

 

                                   

 

                                    AS A HEALTHY DNA IN EVERY CELL, IS A MUST

                                             TO PROTECT US

                                                (not defend us)

                                                   FROM HARM

 

                                            

 

                           YET SOMETIMES THEY'LL GET RUSTY INSTEAD   

                                    THEN THEY CAN BREAK DOWN     

                                             AS THEY; DEFEND US            

                (for we have defenses, defenses everywhere trying to; defend ourselves!)

                    any over-protection/defense can make us extremely sick.

                                   Its our always; alert Immune system.

                    I Am sure that it is from these reactions, a healing come

                                   that is able; to cure all our diseases

                    from a fine balance and a knowing of how it all do work.

 

   

                                                CELLS REACT FROM    

                               learning, still learning; from everything.  

                                                 INSIDE AND OUT

                               from all the things the body must fight.

                                              TO KEEP US ALL ALIVE  

 

                    

  

                                All is so much more and so alive in all.

            YET, IT IS A LIFE, AND I WILL LIVE IT: TO THE BEST OF MY ABILITY. 

            DRESSED TO THE BARE BONES OF THINGS, I STOOD FIRM AND STILL.

                                 As I truly had to learn; to survive, it all.        

                                                      SO NOW

                                    ...AFTER KNOWING ALL OF THIS...

                                              YOU'RE WELCOME

 

                                                                                   

 

                                                    WELCOME                                       

                                                   TO MY STORY

                                                and to visit my life               

                      

          

                                NO; I DO NOT WALK LIKE THIS ALONE

                                        OTHER, THAN IN MY MIND, TO SET MY SELF FREE

                                             PLEASE 

 

                                       

  

                                              MY LIFE                                                          

                                                                   AS          

          

                                      

 

                                        I WELCOME YOU

                                                for this little visit to my world                                      

 

                                      

 

                                           yet do know                                  

                                                 LIFE              

                                   CAN ONLY BE ENTERED         

                                                      

                                                 

                                                                          

                              ♥   BY THE GREATEST OF CARE        

 

                                                        

 

                            as I had to loose, or release, all my 'defenses

                                    just like a little and new born soul  

                                        'when it enters physical life'  

                                                to stay, in my life  

                                                             

                                              

                                    

                               BY LOOSING ALL THE NONE IMPORTANT

           AND NOW ALL THAT, HAS BECOME A SHADOW; OF ITSELF,

                         AS MY TEARS, ARE DRYING UP; I SMILE 

 

                                    

 

                             FOR AS I LOOK BACK, I SEE I HAVE ACHIEVED MUCH

 

 

                                            

 

                                             

                 SLOWLY NOW BEING ABLE TO GIVE A LITTLE SMILE TO ALL AROUND ME

 

 

                                   

 

 

        COMING TO TERMS, WITH A NEW AND TOTAL AWARENESS

              IN EVERY MINUTE AND EVERY SECOND OF THE DAY 

                    MY BODY ABLE TO 'BEAT' 'BREATHE' & EAT  

 

 

                             

 

 

                I still have difficulties, yet, I now see this doorway                             

                                 that was hidden, for years and years.      

                                 

                                    

 

                            

       ...I live very protected I just call it carefully to stay alive therefore in my life...

 

 

                                     

                             

          I have now got another 'outlook' I see, this world differently

                                                      than most of you.

  I have a quiet life, I'm at peace' with this new life form, I do not blame I do not provoke any 

  reaction of anaphylaxis either, which does not mean I will not get them anymore.(For we all

  know accidents - do happen.) I wake up happy, that I have been granted' another day to be

  the best I can be, for The People' I Love or Know. I also try to bring this out to as many as I

  can so you hopefully ;do not end up in my place. So they can live and continue to live & do  

  all things you; NOW take for granted. Just as I did, before all of this started. I Lived my Life,

  I was strong & healthy. I was lively. I was busy. I was very, very happy; as I had the best life,

  happy go lucky smiling to all enjoying the greatness of My Life as it truly was. Know depite

                                          all odds it sill is; its just very different now.

                                                  My Precious Former Life has Left

                                                        yet not without my teas

                                                                        for

                                   Letting all my defenses go is truly the hardest thing

                 to release all fear and stand unprotected yet knowing; I was supported.

               

                                             Its still a beautiful yet simple life.

                                     I wish for it, to continue to be; My Great Life      

                     I still feel, I have something to offer. I love my family, my friends,

                                     I have found inner peace; and a new wealth

                                                and I still enjoy being who I am.

 

                                                   

     Yet, our life changes all the time, it can come from the outside of us, or from our inside.                                       

                                                 

                                                            of life.

 

 When I decided to make my site I had to search my soul; why it was my wish, what it was I so

 wanted to give out. My reason is/was that it must be of valu it must benefit someone it must

 show; a goodness in life and in all, and it must be very; honest and lovingly told to be of use.

 Try to see all things in the small and in the big picture; of 1 self and of every'thing around us

 

                                                  

 

 See we all contain - a diff. range of many coping mechanisms, there will always; be some for

 for you too. I discovered I used a wide array; ways of coping with my 'New Life' depending of

 what I had to cope with as sometimes I could draw on former experiences something where I

 earlier in life's sorrows had found a coping mechanism; that also could help me to cope now.

 Coping mechanisms spring from upbringing, from our genes or from our sum of experience

 

                                                            

 

 Things changes through love, through children, through health, through, what others may be

 doing to us in life, consciously or unconsciously. Things change in a second, for anyone of us

 So we are always in a defense position, we have replaced: 'protected and safe' with a defense.

 Please, when you read about me do remember; I ended up with a most serious kind of allergy

 

                                                            

 

 Whatever - serious dis-eases we may encounter in life, it is there for us to learn to cope with.

 It doesn't mean; we should hide our'self, our feelings, or our lives away, or not cry, or be sad.

 We are allowed to turn to each other for help - support to we can walk with a joy in life again

 Dangers; sorrows comes in many disguises in a thousand forms we can better cope; knowing

 

                                                            

 

 that; we don't have to walk across roads, blind'folded and with earmuffs on & killed. We have

 all learned through life to watch out for dangers yet; that's only be done when we are told or

 or taught and if we learn from experiences even when if we have to learn it all directly or the

 hard way. I didn't know anything about Latex Allergies, and I was not ever warned or taught.

  

                                                               

 

 I knew, I had seen another of my fellow workers with the chemical allergy but my hands had

                                                   nothing seriously first

                                                 just an itch (its an allergy)

                                               some cough, and sneeze, too 

                                            I didn't know about latex powder,

                                         covering; every thing; in & around me.

                                      It was corn powder; Food 'but was changed'                                   .

                                    (please, do read about powders; on my page re. all latex)     

               

                                            

 

                                      It was all black & white. Use gloves; or else.

                                   I was also told; I would be fired, not using them.

                               Yes, I knew a danger; of not using gloves in my work.

                           No, I wasn't tested or looked after while; I was wearing them.

                       From very simple none imp. symptoms I suddenly had anaphylaxis.

 

                                                                                 

 

                          I didn't have other allergies than a pinicillin and a sulfa' allergy

                          these, where very easy to cope with and to avoid in my life too.

                          Yet had never been life threatening, just as very severe rashes.

                          At my work; it seemed irrelevant; to ask us about any allergies.

                          That, as I have discovered later was another big mistake done. 

                          For No warnings, No Knowledge = No Choice either for anyone.

 

                   

 

                                          So here, You get One from me.

                                    A defends wards off; protection holds safe. 

                                I was being; defended; by latex, not protected.

                          Now I will light the shadow roads; to reveal surprises to you.

                    Then you do not have to live without; all your own possibilities in life.

               You, can choose to know, you can choose to close your eyes and ears to this. 

                                                             PLEASE   

           Choose to know; how best to stay protected and safe, without a big defense.

       Without any fears, for you then Know what to look out for & can look around you; proper. 

                                                         

                                                         

 

                             ...So, now there is no need; to play dice; with your life...

 as our industries grows continually, other problems; will later come to the surface with other

 results, and from new; "things" in our daily lives therefore we must develop new teachings or

 we can at least teach each other; so we can build up an  inner awareness in our bodies so we

 can live in safely in our environment. Its very, very important so we must help each other. We

 can not pack each other; in cotton wool and no, neither should we. We can however treat life

 with proper respect; all life, and each other on this earth, as we would like; to be treated too.

                              ...just live and let live, be the one you seek in another...

                                                                   

                              ...try live in joy, a fearless life; treasure what you have...                          

 That can only be done; in an environment; of trust & for thousands of years, we have learned

 not' to trust anyone, or anything around us mistrust - has been sneaking into all our lives by

 these ways; we treat each other all the time. We are the ones who have birthed all of this, we

 are these ones ourselves who causes each others fears we are the ones who can change it all

 back again, if we can go through pains, darkness of the mistrust into a world based; on trust.

                              ...trust that; what you receive in your life is yours to live...

                                                                  

                              ...live it fearlessly; live it with a vigor & great creativity...

 Please do remember that we see; a fear straight in the eyes - just by naming it, we recognize

 we do not own it, knowing fear is nothing; to fear; but that it is an armor, of all our own past

 experiences. So before we venture further into my story, you have to understand; all of these

 feelings, as it was something I too have had to deal with, living through this; in my life. When

 we know exactly what a fear is, how fear behave; we can use its power to en'power ourselves.

                             ...be bold; yet kind, be forward thinking, yet; all loving...

                                                             

                             ...find your own inner power; become an earth pioneer...

 For truly the biggest thing that can happen in our lives is when we can transfer our fears into

 a new inner power a pure new raw energy to create a new form for life. That comes automatic

 when we see fear and stand up to our fears when we go through our fears as if we where in a 

 huge fight with a Lion or a Tiger we have conquered our worst enemy and we have won a new

 place in a brand new & fearless world; where we know; we can pull down our defenses, its OK.

                           ...so we all together; can recreate that; which freezes us...

                                                                

                           ...being aware of that which make us so hot; that we fight...

 If; AS IT IS SAID; now being proven too, we are spoiling; our own environment, and this all so

 Beautiful Earth of ours, big time. We are in for a very tough ride a ride that is going to be very

 bumpy then we will be doing it together; this time around. So we must now stand; very firmly

 together, either we want to or not, mother nature decide that enough is enough and shake us.

 Our world is filled our hospitals are filled our bodies are filled; all our days, are filled' - all up

                          ...just see the world we together, are producing none stop...

 

            

                                                              FOR       

 our disregard and discord with a natural world, has now dead'ned us all so much, we give up

 People all over the world live in horrible conditions in hunger and without a roof and no help.

 Its all running over; spilling out to be taken into account to be seen - to be fixed by all of us.

 Pollution levels increases so fast, we see it not as we run after lost time, lost lives to sickness

 so death do us part, for all do now increase further, as our own hungers, for more and better

 things increase so fast. We still see it not; before we ourselves is almost left for dead, in this.

                          

           

 

                                                               BY

 

 truly looking on this world without rose' colored glasses in this 21 AD we're we should be so

 ashamed. We do not care at all, for a living thing be it soil,air,water,plant,animals or humans.

 We can no longer ask "Why me"? for it truly is; why not me! In a spoiled world - of ours we've

 created this, so fast, that not many of us truly has had time to see it before its dumped on us

 we all know it deep inside yet before it hit home to us we don't re'act. That's inclusive myself.

 Now its with a togetherness - with positive & loving thoughts and actions, we all can survive.

 This youll understand completely by reading my pages about the hidden things we are doing';      

                                           BUT, IT IS OUR INDIVIDUAL CHOICE

 

                              

 

                                             YET KNOW; ALL IS BACK TO FRONT

                            WE OFTEN HATE WITHOUT THINKING DEEPER OVER WHY

                            IF WE THINK IT THROUGH; WE CAN SEE IT IS ONLY FEARS,

                            FEARS SPOIL SO MANY THINGS, IN OUR LIVES AND HEART.

 

                                                     

 

                     WE DESTROY A HEALTH WITHOUT A CARE THAT ISN'T A HEALTH CARE.

                     WE DESTROY THE JUSTICE BY LOOKING AT IT AS JUST A GAME TO PLAY,

                     WE DESTROY THEN A GREAT WEALTH FOR ALL, JUST TO SAY; 'WE WON'

                     WE DESTROY OUR WISDOM, BY THINKING; IT IS JUST OUR; KNOWLEDGE.

                     WE DESTROY TRUTHS BY MANIPULATING OUR TRUTH TO FIT INTO LIFE.

                     WE DESTROY PEACE; FOR ALL BY THE WARS WE FIGHT; CONTINUOUSLY.

                     WE DESTROY OUR FREEDOM 'BY LETTING A DEFAULT'; INTO OUR LIVES.

                     WE DESTROY LOVE BY NOT HAVING KINDNESS AND ANY; COMPASSION.

                     WE DESTROY MANY LIVES, BY NOT CARING OR SHARING; A TRUE LOVE.

                     WE DESTROY EARTH; BY NOT RESPECTING EVERY & ALL LIVING THING'.

 

                                                    

 

                               IF WE CAN JUST RELAX A LITTLE, WE KNOW NOT A HATE

                               HATE FOSTERS FEAR. ONLY LOVE AND CARE DIMINISH IT

                               TO TRULY LIVE TOGETHER; IN PEACE & LOVE ON EARTH.

                                        THEN WE HAVE, TURNED IT ALL AROUND

 

                                    

          

                                           FOR ALWAYS WE EACH; HAVE A CHOICE

 

                                      

 

                                               NOW IGNITE YOUR LOVING HEART

                                                               AND JUST                                                         

                             REMEMBER THIS PLEASE; ALL LIFE IS VERY PRECIOUS

 

             

       

 It do not matter who we are or where we live. It does matter, how we live the life we have got.

 I'm still better of than - many other people, in our world. Yet by reading this my story from a

 western view no one would think it so. I have warmt - I have Love, I can drink the water and a

 few more things can I do eat a bit of food. Yes I do Live even its a far cry from my former life.

 This is something for us all to be aware of for 'things' iare now really getting; into our bodies.

 Please remember I am only writing this because it can be any ones life in this our world today.

 I am not complaining I'm only trying to explain a new form of dis'ability, that has now arrived

 

                                                     

 

 I'll tell you these ways I can live where I avoid risking my life in everything; I do, a daily world.

 There's different stages; to this Latex Hypersensitivity, for its ever evolving depending doses,

 it shows up, after any serious attack; when you live in this so highly sensitive state; of health.

 That's if you survive; anaphylaxis in the first place know it never stops there anymore for me.

 See our immune system is highly developed its job IS to protect us from all harm to our body

 It is now at a point where all my cells keep being on this high alert now its 'Mastocytosis like'

 where it do - will affect the whole of my body for a long time or all the time I will never know.

 

                                                                    

 

 Most times it affect my lungs, heart, mouth, intestines, these immune cells nerves and brain,

 with severe breathing, heartbeat problems, hoarseness, sores, pains, lumps, swellings,spots.

 Confusion, blueness, severe headaches, nausea, diarrhoea, bladder irritation; it slowly eases,

 bone pains, muscle pains, cramps, severe chest tightness, with coughing, and lots of mucus

 tiredness, lymph node swellings goes up & down - can even completely disappear for awhile

 all at this same time yet not always in the same order or degree again it all depends what its

'that started the ravine in the first place. How long it takes to get better only my body knows.

 

                                                        

 

                  This is all happening besides these Anaphylaxis I still get occasionally. 

                  Some symptoms belong together it is anaphylaxis too. Other comes in

                  through 'the back door later' and they last for days or even for weeks.

                                                                ***

                  When I have pains, swellings, breathing difficulties I can be difficult to

                  be around, as I can't even have; painkillers, react to them too. I don't

                  bottle up and hide my pain, I got to have an outlet, for all this; misery

                                                               ***

                  I am incredibly lucky; I have such an understanding family, they know

                  me well and know; that as soon my pain disappear, I am back to my

                  old and positive self again until it all start once more from something.

                                                               ***

                  Recovering times comes around again and again, now healing myself.  

                  So I'm still living, behind this curtain; of life, hidden away from you all.

                  Yet my life's flame is burning strong as I still has so much to do in life. 

                                                         

                    

 

 All I do now is in small drops at anyone time otherwise it upset that balance within I' Can Live.

 My life changed - I had to change internally and externally, I had to find a new way to live life

 with it all from this damage, I too did get from a negligent behavior of this commercial world.

 Where money - prestige is a reigning force of so many workplaces without care, for a worker.

 For You too can reach this new stage if you body goes into a sensitivity so high, it affects the

 whole body. Most of this time you have great pains, so many things starts to break down too

 you never know what is around a next corner. This is, where you really feel you're so isolated

 it is this point that is not understood. Only the people - who live with you from day to day do.

 For in my heightened sensitivity anything will/do affect my body to its all calmed down, again

                         AS I HAVE TO LEAVE MY FORMER LIFE, AND YOUR WORLD BEHIND

 

                                                                                                 

                                                            SO NOW

                    on the very few days, where I can function, to the best of my ability.

                I have found many new ways to live and to be happy, many different ways,

                                                      by; knowing my risk.

 

                                                  

                                                    'And a can do attitude'

                                               YET; IT IS REALLY HARD WORK

                                         DAY AFTER DAY, KEEPING IN BALANCE

            I have become aware, that it was only through my own ability; to distract myself,

    that I could survive mentally and psychological, to be so restricted, in my life, as I am now.

            Yet, I still believe in my Healing, I still believe I can do something with inner help.

                                              Setting my body into new Balance

 

 

                        

                          ... these few days have become my treasure times where...

 I read - I write, I talk on the phone, when I am able to. I'll study; on the internet, all that I can

 and what ever subject I find interesting at any time. I've my procedures with medications and

 must follow a strict diet. I practice; yoga, tai-chi, whenever; I can, then I meditate too. I keep;

 as Positive in my daily life as I possible can. If I can I sit in the garden I listen, read as most of

 my former love for gardening, now its a distant memory, I listen to great music, and I do also

 watch documentary, some movies too. All of it ... in the safety, of our own home. Yes, my life

 is now the form of tranquility - so many are seeking. I know I am very lucky. Yes I Do Know It

                                     I GIVE MY THANKS TO WHERE IT BELONGS

 

                                                  

 

                                                           When I pray

                          ...For I have quiet times in myself with the God Power in me... 

                This, inner Divine Power, always helps' me to believe, that I will be Healed.

          Healing is a process, its a flow of Knowing I Am Created in his own picture, By God  

                 For Miracles can/do happen and I DO believe strongly in the Power of ALL. 

                         ...I know anything is possible if we set our goal with a Divine...

                                                       I am calmed no end

 

                                    

 

                                 NOW I WANT TO GIVE MY HUSBAND A BIG THANK YOU

 I Want - to Thank' My Husband - he is the best he is always there in support in body in spirit

 by his' loving soul, nothing is too big; a problem, nothing can't get fixed, or changed around.

 He is the Love; of my life, my best friend & he do not just give in to me; if I'm wrong, this has

 given me so much support at the times where I couldn't see right from wrong, in my new life.

 He has given up so much of his former life too, to support me, to be with me be there for me

 I hold him so dear I hold him so near I hold him deep in my soul for all he has and do for me.

                               OUR LIFE HAS ALWAYS BEEN PRECIOUS AND FULL OF CARE.

                                                    I DO LOVE HIM SO MUCH 

 

                                   

                                      HE IS THE LOVE AND THE LIGHT OF MY LIFE   

                          as I am always shown great blessings in life from everywhere

 Our Son with his happy smiles his caring and uplifting words he carried me on wings through

 the worst of times he's always there with hugs and a willingness to step in and help if needed

 always there with loving hands, support with comfort a great chat willing ears, to all my pains

 yet, giving up so much of what was in our lives together of before so we still; can be together

 as often as it fit into our lives with the greatest of care also from a beautiful person who's the

 love of his life. For see we are lucky to share her in our lives too. We all feel very, very Blessed

 as we also have got beautiful granchildren now - that has been a huge bonus for us as family 

                                    AS THE LOVE AND CARE IS ALWAYS IN THE AIR.

 For he has given us a wonderful Daughter in Law a Truly Caring Soul A Beautiful Human Being

 two'gether they've added to our Life a new form of Happiness. A New Light, has come into me

 as I see I ollow all the ways of their lives. I got Extra Family I got More Life back. Know We feel

 very Blessed & Fortunate for they have also given us this' meaning of Life Back by producing a

 Beautiful children and now; we can't wait to Follow; their lives too. The Tides is Turning' as we

 again find new life around us. There's nothing that can't be overcome by Love & Appreiciation

 I'm sure you all also have experienced in your lives - do not ever give in or give up, remember

                                   A THANKS-GIVING' FOR THE BLESSINGS WE HAVE.  

 

                                     

 

                                         I am/we are always supported too by;

                                  all our family and friends, nabours reach out too.

 My family is always there never more than a thought or a phone call away to brighten any day

 so many memories so much to talk about as life too, can be difficult for everyone everywhere.

 Our Friends they had a rough time to understand they can't just come around, yet phone calls

 is always there between us to support and to spirit'up whenever the blackness take overhand.

 SEE THEIR SUPPORT IS WORTH MORE' THAN GOLD TO ME, THAT HAS TRULY GIVEN ME GREAT

                                      HOPES AND OFTEN IT DRIED ALL OF MY TEARS

                                              AS THEY; WHERE WIPED AWAY                                 

                                                      BY ALL THEIR LOVE

 

                                                  

 

                                                                000

                                                         YET FOR NOW

                              STILL my warnings...do come...fast/faster and NOW

  so many of my reactions are BAD/or SERIOUS triggers, and I do not always now, when it is not

                                        triggers/reactions from everywhere

 

                                   

 

                                  Mast Cell in a calm state           Mast Cell in an Eruption

                            making breathing so difficult, giving swellings and pains among all other things

                                                         ( squished and up against a wall again)

 

                                     

 

                                                                              STILLNESS

                                                             SO, I AM  BACK; TO MY HEALING

                                          LUCKY AS I NOW KNOW, OUR BODY CAN HEAL ALMOST ALL,

                                                             TIME DO TAKE CARE OF THE REST

                                                                         IN STILLNESS AND  

 

    

 

                                                  SEE, OUR BODIES ARE  TRULY;  SO MIRACULOUS 

                                                     'THEY' TRULY; HAVE A LIFE OF THEIR OWN

                                                        'THEY WILL KNOW AND DO; 'SEE'; IT ALL

                                                           AS; 'THEY'; CAN SENSE 'THINGS 'TOO,

                                                             ALL OUR CELLS TALK NONE STOP

 

                                                    

 

                                                                      'nerve cells talking'

                        Transforming, reconnecting, evolving with everything around them; 

                                                   in service to us all.

 

                                                    

                                           ( Like this magic circle here)

 Never sleep, never standing still, always trying their best to do with what it is we give to them

 what are we feeding our bodies - our souls and how do we use our own spirit to choose it all.

 Drowning ourselves in the sea of "New Things" around us that we must have that we can't live

 without? No don't think for a minute, that I haven't been there, for I certainly have - it was me

 too I was and I am no different; to anyone else on this earth. I together - with so many others

 now, in the world we've paid the price with a damage it has caused, in my/our lives today too,

                    by our cancers, allergies sensitivities and many mental disorders too.

 

                     

 

                                          OUR IMMUNE SYSTEMS ORGANS AND CELLS

                           ( working so tireless, to make us healthy. They help us all to stay alive, and so fine.)

                           Yet, sometimes it becomes the body's cure; that kills us instead.

 

                                             

 

                                                              FOR SEE

                       Every things goes awray when we can't trust people around us

                       to understand; how sensitive we are, we become very anxious

                       we'll become so overprotective of ourselves and of everything.

                       If we've had experiences of neglect, or of a can't care; attitude

                       it is incredible difficult, to trust anyone, literally with your life

                       especially when you know what is happening, and they do not.                      

                                            THAT DOES NOT HELP US AT ALL.

 

                                              

 

 To live with this is not as any other sickness or rather dis'ease in life, for our limit or the turn

 a point of death can be measured in seconds, minutes at any given time just as heart attacks

 yet not many of us go around thinking we can get a heart attack in the next now, that is now

 the way we have to live to stay protected and to stay alive we must be aware of all that we do.

 We'll never know when we have been near something our bodies react to we cant always; see

 all that is affecting us we have to live it by a trial and error and try to survive it every time too.                                                                                        

                                     How would you live; A LIFE like this, all the time?

 

               

 

                        ...See its now my body; that's telling me, warning me, every time...

                    and I do listen, for I have learned the hard way, that my body don't lie.

             Having had very serious experiences, not knowing a cause, yet later confirmed.

 

                                                       

 

 Everything in my life is now as I can do it my body indicates that; by being without symptoms

 then I'll start doing some more and again the awareness; sit on my shoulder, for I don't know

 where my limits are I don't know the borderline, before I have stepped over it yet again; NOW

 With swellings that can come anywhere even inside my mouth creating tooth pain I would not

 wish on anyone spots & the sores crying in pains not able to get painkillers as I react to them 

 

                                                       

 

 Perfume, make up, beautiful soaps, hair colors & perms; has all now gone; from my life. As a

 woman that was very, very difficult to accept and live with as it completely changed who I was

 how I presented myself to this world. Yet - when it's almost killing you' you know you have to

 let it go. Even, with a possible death hanging over my head for not being able to breathe' and

 with so many other symptoms coming on none stop, I cried and cried, for there was so many

 goodbyes I constantly had to say when my life fell' like the card'house around me, as so many

 foods too left my life. It do change our lives around completely - when our sensitivity become 

 life threatening; our days are so monitored to the slightest detail and if new attacks shows its

 head - that has to be incorporated too. This is no easy task, for anyone living with or around.

 

                                                       

 

 I, could not believe how many things started this ravine " sat me off like a bomb" health'wise.

 I know there is many, many other forms for severe sickness; in this our world, terrible things

 and disabilities, which so totally too alter lives. Yes I do know your pain I do understand it all.

 Lives torn apart; in war zones - in this world famine and earth-disasters too, happens all the

 time. I know we can not compare yet we can care - we can show compassion - and give help.

 I know their pain I live that pain too so that is what help me, as I see others difficulties to live

 with and within - what's truly going on; everywhere on this Earth of ours from these traumas.

 Now it is easy to understand; a disability that can be seen on our bodies. Ours can't be seen

           this is still not accepted no'one really understand it either how dangerous it is.

                                           Yet It is still my/our so beautiful life  

 

                                                    

 

               As I know a lot more and I'm able to also keep myself safer in my daily life.                                                                                                                                                     

                          BUT, THAT WAS NOT ALWAYS; SO

 

 

              Time has stood still in my life for years, as I had to learn an to cope with this

    

              

                                                

              FOR SEE WHEN I AM NOW LOOKING BACK THROUGH THE MIST OF THE LATEX 

                                                                   

              WHEN; ALL THIS; CAME INTO MY LIFE, I KNEW NOT; WHAT WAS AHEAD OF ME

 I had no idea how it would or could; turn my/our life upside down, how it was going to bleed

 into everything we did enjoy in our life I thought a little medication was going to do wonders

 so I just had to recuperate - and then I could go straight back, to where I left off. How wrong

 I was how naive we where and how dangerous it was that my doctors' did not tell us anything

 From that point it was 1 big roller coaster a ride, where we all where clinging to 'my dear life'

 After my first Latex anaphylaxis to the gloves I had to wear had given me the fright of my life

 I understood nothing of what truly was going on, only that I never wanted, to experience that

 again. Also here I was so wrong as it now came again and again as I was tested as I was going 

 about in my life as I was eating - as I was just living and doing all the normal things I used to

               I HAD TO LEARN SO FAST; I HAD TO RELY ON MY OWN SURVIVAL INSTINCTS.

 

      

 

              NO ONE AROUND ME; 'UNDERSTOOD WHY I WENT INTO THESE ANAPHYLAXIS'. 

 Seemingly 'by the drop of a hat' neither did I - now I lived it, I had to survive it too every time

 I truly fought for my life. I truly fought against a negligence of enormous proportions around

 me. I was dismissed as a malingerer 'one that was out to get something'. No one understood,

 seeing specialists & before a test telling them of my anaphylaxis - to what - yet not' believed

 so again reacting with asthma or an anaphylaxis attack, to their testing first then 'they knew' 

 that 'IT' was truly what I had got. Still underscoring my plight - negligent, as I already' had IT

 truly it spoiled my life (everything they too knew, as a life) what it meant to be living in a life.

 When they finally realized what went wrong it was truly too late my body had turned a corner

 where it now recognized everything that was alike it reacted virulently, even when I/we didn't

 know how it all was connected up. Again question upon question had to asked had to be fully

 researched - answered before any dangers could be eliminated from my/our life or surviving.

                THESE LIFE THREATENING ANAPHYLAXIS I HAD UNDER & AFTER MY TESTING.

 

                                                     

 

                                 LEFT US, TO ALL THESE DANGERS THEY ALL KNEW

                                                  ABOUT, AGAIN AND AGAIN

                                  WITH; EPI PENS & TOLD TO JUST; USE IT YOURSELF

 

                                                      

 

                                 WITH; NO HELP FROM; THESE PEOPLE IN THE KNOW

                                                 "PROTECTING THEMSELVES".

                                 THEN KNOWING OF THE MISTAKES SEE IN A TRUTH;

 

                                       

 

                                  SEEING A POSSIBLE NEGLIGENCE COURT CASE, SO

                                                  THEY KNEW WHAT TO WRITE,

                                  TO SET THEMSELVES FREE OF THE RESPONSIBILITY

 

                                        

 

                                   A KNOWING'NESS, CAN BECOME GREAT WISDOM,

                                               IT CAN BE MANIPULATION TOO

                                   THEN GOING AROUND IN CIRCLES TO NOWHERE

 

                                                          

 

                                    IN FALSE RAPPORTS; TO PROTECT THEM SELVES

                                               PROTECT THEIR OWN MISTAKES.

                                    AS A WORKER IS REGARDED AS NOT IMPORTANT

 

                                                                  

 

                                     THEN SENT US SAILING IN THE SEA OF SILENCE,

                                                 IN DECEIT, YES A DISREGARD

                                       OF ANY DANGER JUST WASHED THEIR HANDS,

 

                                           

 

                   OF WHAT TRULY IS A DUTY & CARE? WHEN THINGS CAN'T BE RE-DONE.            

 See when money or a possible compensation, comes into this equation; we will not be looked

 after proper by the people in the know. If I had got sick away from work if I had got any other

 sickness, I would have been looked after proper from the beginning. They would not have left

 me to my own devises the way they did. I was first treated by a specialist also a director of the

 same company, as I worked. What had; and was happening I later discovered was Never being

 written proper in my Journal, and who was trusted, more than I, then?? Yes I was naive yet see

 I truly knew nothing of the dangers; of powdered gloves. Weeks before, I had symptoms while

 at work - I knew not what I was getting then. I knew not about serious allergies as they where

 not really a part of my family history. I had seen hand reaction yet these so serious lung ones

              I DID NOT CONNECT; TO MY OWN USE OF THESE; POWDERED LATEX GLOVES,  

 

      

 

           ...I UNDERSTOOD NOT; WHY I SUDDENLY COULD NOT BREATHE, MY SWELLINGS...

 Now I don't write this to complain happened has happened, and I too still has a life a form of

 life that I now can live. I write it because I know many more people, have had many so similar

 experiences and because other workplaces / industries, still use these gloves. Yes, I know we

 got to be careful; not to get other contagious diseases; yet there's many, who still uses these

who don't need to. Why is powdered gloves still manufactured to this day when all knows they

 are the most dangerous ones - to our health and well being why - are they not being banded

 20 years past the knowing that it is this latex glove powders that contain and spread all these

 so devastating latex proteins everywhere they are in use? Why can that not just be stopped???

 

                      ***> http://safety-matters-in-bussiness.blogspot.com/2009/07/

                                     latex-allergy-health-and-safety-and.html <***

 

              YET THERE IS NO RESPECT, NO CONCERN, NO REAL HELP TO ELIMINATE THIS.

      

 

              I CAN HAVE MANY ATTACKS A DAY AND I HAVE DAYS; WHERE I HAVE NONE.

 

 So many things affect me now pollens, smoke and pollutions when I venture outside and even

 getting stuck in traffic; tunnels, smoke from fireplaces set me off; or build up on top of other

 stuff grass cuttings some washing powders, and personal soap, some printed materials, then

 even; my new computer had something 'in it' when it' warmed up. We have to be; careful with

 pen grips mouse pads many plants in my garden will affect me if they are being cut. Going to

 the shops is a thing of the past, as I always get sick afterward, now that has become 'a treat' I

 do when/if I feel I can handle to become sick yet another time. Kknow I could continue; none

 stop, with all the things I never do anymore. Yet that is the past for me now, I finally' learned.

                THAT BLISS; COMES FROM FEELING HEALTHY, FROM LIVING IN AWARENESS.

 

       

 

                FOR; AN INNER POWER THEN COMES FORT, ABOUT HOW TO COPE MY LIFE

 Yet, the hardest and the most difficult and most dangerous attacks, has always been from my 

 FOODS. FOOD MY PRECIOUS FOODS HAS ALL BUT LEFT MY LIFE NOW TO BE ABLE; TO SURVIVE.

 Even these attacks can be different every time, more or less; depending what it is' I am eating

 knowing I had to eat and drink something to survive yet not understanding the cross allergies

 or how sensitive I was at that time what part of my body was affected. It has been a very, very

 difficult & very frightening experiencing having food allergies or sensitivities OAS always hurt

 'times never ended' to I/we and my doctors my specialists or dietitians found out these foods

 that I still can eat. It took years and it took all my inner power; to stay calm whenever I had to

 eat, or try to eat different foods, always ready with my adrenaline and other medications, and

              KNOW PRE'MEDICATIONS WAS NEVER ABLE TO QUELL ATTACKS COMPLETELY,

 

         

 

               SO LOST IS FOREVER; THE FESTIVE SEASONS FOR ME NOW AS I GO WITHOUT 

 

 Yes its OK for my life is getting back to a level where I better can live with it all in inner peace.

 It has been a huge trip to come to this point, a steep learning curve. It was devastating a long

 time, when we learned about; Foods I could eat i.e getting attacks; when eating any food with

 the proteins that I reacted to. Times with breathlessness and asthma spots and swelling, with

 vomiting and diarrhea and forever an adrenaline injecting kit ready or in use. It was the worst

 time of our lives. Whenever I was eating a foods I had not had for a while to just; wait and see

 what would happen and we never had to wait for long the reaction came very, very fast and it

 was such a nerve'wracking experience not to know if this was it if IT was my last meal; in life.

                YET, WE ALL HAVE TO HAVE SOME FOOD, EAT TO SURVIVE IN OUR LIVES.

 

      

 

                WE WILL NEVER FORGET; THAT HORROR TIME, FOR AS LONG, AS WE LIVE,

 Now living a simplified life living in a world where I'm better, live without always becoming so

 sick. Besides all these foods and drinks; I had to give up, there was a million other things too.

 Gone are the toothbrushes; with rubber grips, gone are all the clothes; with elastic too, shoes

 small' pieces; on phone, calculators, computer mouse with rubber/latex, pencil grips, erasers

 any glue - all no' slip' material, rubber bands, yes; anything with any rubber grip, some cords

 tyres, carpet with rubber backing adhesive tapes, medical equip. on and on it goes. Yet other

 things can be difficult to avoid, i.e food preparation with latex gloves food packaging the seal

 in car doors or other seals - gasket or hoses; hidden within things, yes we still find new stuff.

               THIS WILL JUST GIVE A SMALL PICTURE, OF ALL LATEX RUBBER IN OUR LIVES.

 

      

     

             ITS NO SMALL FEAT TO LEARN TO LIVE IN A; LATEX-FOOD-MATERIAL WORLD

 

                                   

 

     I KNOW. I STILL WILL GET ATTACK I HOPE AND I BELIEVE I CAN KEEP THEM T BAY, SO MY

     BODY CAN FIND PEACE AND FORGET, IT EVER REACTED THIS WAY, I BELIEVE I CAN HEAL.

 

                                           

 

              ALSO DESPITE ALL 'IN THE KNOW' SAY I HAVE THIS FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE 

 

 

   PLEASE, PLEASE LISTEN TO WHAT I TELL YOU ABOUT NOW;

 

 

              THESE ALLERGIES; CUT DEEP INTO ANY LIFE, DEEP INTO WHAT WE CAN DO.

 

        

 

             DO NOT; END UP; WHERE WE ARE NOW. LOOK AFTER YOU, AND YOUR FAMILY.

          

                    

 

                                                  PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE

            BE AWARE THAT FAMILY, OR ANY OTHER PARTY TIME IS WHERE THE GREATEST

            DANGERS ARE FOUND WHERE PEOPLE OFTEN DO THINGS' DIFFERENT TO WHAT

            THEY NORMALLY DO REGARDING FOODS, DECORATION, CLOTHES OR BY THEIR

            USE OF PERFUMES OR AFTERSHAVES, BY WHAT THEY DRINK OR WHAT IS EATEN.

            OFTEN WE GO TO DIFFERENT PLACES, WHERE THINGS ARE AROUND US WE ARE

            ALLERGIC TO, AND SEE BECAUSE IT DO NOT AFFECT OTHER PEOPLE; IT IS VERY

            DIFFICULT FOR THEM, TO UNDERSTAND OUR ENORMOUS ALLERGY/SENSITIVITY.

            ITS SOMETIMES IMPOSSIBLE TO BE THERE AT ALL; WITHOUT SERIOUSLY RISKING'

            A LIFE THREATENING ALLERGIC REACTION, AND IT COMES; SO FAST... SO FAST.

 

                                 

 

           SOMETIMES THE COLD, THE HOT, THE NATURAL EVEN GET US SHAKEN UP TOO

 

                                   

 

            SO NOW WE DO LIVE WITH ENORMOUS RISK TO OUR LIVES ITS NONE STOP TOO 

 

                                             

 

  Yes, we must live and we must eat, and breathe; to live a good life. yet if you get severe food

  allergies and serious or acute asthma and anaphylaxis then know life as we know it is altered

  forever nothing no thing' will ever be the same anymore. As life; is enormous isolated and all

  that we do has to be planed in the smallest detail' all the time no impulses, no urgency when

  doing anything, think and think and think ones more before we do anything. Touch, eat even

  all we drink, all our food is prepared; separately, different just as we eat, different foods now

  where so many, many things can make us instant sick or give us the delayed bodily reactions

  So many NO, NO so many sorry I can't do this' or that. Yes it very, very difficult & depressing.

  Yet we/I must find a way to live the life I have now, find back to happiness find peace in soul.

  

 

      

               

  Therefore, I see not so much more what I can,or can't do I just don't DO; what I know; I can't

  then I concentrate on what I can how I can use my time, to be of some benefit without being

  put in dangers all the time. Then my mind my body and my soul can relax, and feel just fine.

  I love - when I can sit outside, when I can watch clouds bloom, and see the birds being busy

  feeding their young listen to music reading a book & talk to family and friends on the phone.

  I'm writing much poetry is really healing and to write my thoughts do heal too to write what I

  have learned on this my/our Journey is good for my soul as I can give you what I was missing.

  It is difficult to have people coming around if they wear something that set my body of like a

  rocket I and these serious attacks scare them for life as they become aware how we truly live

  

         

 

 I have despite this had much help in my life in my days to cope with this often from strangers

 people that suddenly realized how lucky they are, yet was able to help me/us somehow; to be 

 to become strong by the way they understood. Other people have left our life as they was not

 able to cope with these huge life changing alterations in our life was not able to cope with me

 being sick or needy' being angry or crying when they got over their own so serious sicknesses

 and I felt sorry for myself as I was still in this life a life, I must learn to accept learn to become

 friends with yet again. The hardest thing has been to let go of big celebrations our own or the

 people we know and love. Yet we understand it is impossible to have people understand, that

 I cant be near the balloons, the perfumes, smoke and its really hard; to 'see' people eat foods.

 

         

 

 Foods that was no problem before all of this Food I ones loved to eat and to cook so going to

 parties has become a too big reminder of all that is no more possible in my life. Yes I know it

 sound pathetic yet I do not know how you would feel about not alone giving all of this up but

 also; not even being able to be there; because of dangers; it represent. No, do not think for a 

 moment I did not try I did and again and again, I was left with serious allergy attacks that left

 me serious sick. Just remember that my triggers came as inhaling ingesting injecting & touch.

 So it is to protect my now fragile body, mind, spirit and soul, that I have found it is easier just

 to step back. Then I can feel safe then I know, what I do, then I can think and I can have a life.

 A life where I can begin to heal all the damage all the reactions, has given me for a long time.

 

      

 

 I am not going to give up or to give in I am not going to feel like a victim or any jailed person.

 I am free in my spirit & from my mind the way I just change things around and away from any

 pain or fright that I get. I look after my body as best as I can, I believe that I can be better too

 yet that will only happen when I try. I know my limits now so they' are the ones that has made

 me strong they are the ones that has shown me, where I can trust myself to live & to be; Free,

 Free from suffering - big pains, free from frightening; life threatening anaphylaxis or Asthma.

 This is my life now, against all odds - I am going to live: This My Life to the best of my ability.

 I will protect myself I will be fully aware of what I do I will not say; oh maybe I can do this now

 for that landed me; in trouble far too many times in the years gone by; as I didn't understand.

 

       

 

             SICKNESS FOR YEARS I CAN HARDLY REMEMBER        

 

 

      

 

   No more will I freely go around in your world, for I have learned the hard way through pain

   and huge warnings from my body, how dangerous it truly can be for me for you and for all.

 

                                            

 

   No more; are they going to hold me ransom, no more am I listening, to anyone else than my

   own body, it is that and only that which can tell me about what dangers I encounter in a day

 

                                             

 

   No more will I do things because I think I can, or someone tells me should try, only and only

   if I feel safe, if I am ready and able to treat any adverse reaction my body goes into as Now.

 

                                             

 

   No more; will I feel so sick as I did for years upon years because I didn't know enough about

   what truly was going on so I just pushed myself. As others denied so too did I unfortunately.

 

                                                                              

  

   No more; will I feel sad that I can't do this or that; I live my life I will feel lucky that I still has

   a Life, the Greatest Husband, a Beautiful Son, my Family and Friends & Strangers, who smile.

 

                                          

 

   No more am I going to let anyone decide what's the best for me without I know that it is too

   for it is here I run into the greatest troubles and that is now; a no, no for me; I live in safety.

 

                                        

 

   No more will I easy give in or give up thinking its all too hard. No more am I going to just sit

   back and cry and cry for what has been done; to me, I am going to show, that it can be lived.

 

                                         

 

  No more am I going to be bitter; angry or feel; that I have been left behind. in all others lives

  just because I can't join them in their lives. I am going to make the best of all that I have left.

 

 

                          

 

 

  SEE I STILL HAVE TIME LEFT, I CAN STILL OFFER SOMETHING TO SOMEONE I CAN LIVE MY LIFE

 

 

                         

 

 

  BECAUSE, I HAVE BEEN HELPED; NO END, BY THESE PEOPLE, WHO CARE ABOUT ME; AS I AM

                     

 

              

 

 

    SO PLEASE COME AND JOIN ME ON MY HEALING JOURNEY, NOW AND THEN I WILL RE-NEW.

 

    I DO KNOW; I CAN SURVIVE; TO MY TIME; IS UP, IF I KEEP LOOKING AFTER; MY SELF; FULLY.

 

    I WILL STEP UP & OUT IN MYSELF, I WILL BECOME SOMETHING I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS IN LIFE.

 

    I WILL NOW THANK EVERY SOUL THAT HAS HELPED ME REACH TO THIS STAGE IN MY SELF

 

    I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR ALL I HAVE LEARNED, ALL I HAVE DISCOVERED ABOUT ALL OF LIFE.

 

 

              

 

 

    I KNOW BY A BELIEF AND BY PRAYERS I TOO CAN HEAL MY BODY AND MY CELLS BE A'NEW.

 

    I CAN SING IN MY SOUL WHEN I ENJOY THE NATURE STILL UNPOLLUTED AROUND ME NOW.

 

    I AM SO DELIGHTED I STILL HAVE A LIFE, I HAVE MY SMILES, IF MY LAUGHTER GIVES PAINS.

  

    I DO APPRECIATE, THE HARD LESSONS; THESE HARD YEARS, AS THEY TAUGHT; SO MUCH.

 

    SO NOW I STEP BACK INTO MY HEALING PEACE; IN MY QUIET LIFE, WITH MY; LOVED ONES.

 

                                                             AS I AM 

   

 

   YES, IT IS 'A JOB' THAT IS VERY TIME CONSUMING, AS IT IS ALSO TO BEING AWARE; THAT IT

   MAYBE INSTEAD; IS OUR WORLD THAT NEEDS THIS HEALING BEFORE ALL DO END AS WE'RE

   ARE USING AND ABUSING; AS IF A TOMORROW MATTERS NOT, PLEASE LOOK AROUND; SEE. 

 

 

               >> About the array of chemicals in use and what it do to our health too <<

 

 

 

 

   WE ARE NOW NOT THOUSANDS NO WE ARE MILLIONS IN ALL PARTS OF OUR WORLD TODAY

   WHO ARE AFFECTED, ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, WITH SENSITIVITIES, CANCERS OR ALLERGIES

   AND A THOUSAND OTHER FORMS FOR MISERY, DAILY OR WEEKLY NOT ABLE TO FUNCTION. 

 

 

                       

 

 

   ALL LONGING' FOR A 'NEW LIFE-PATTERN' TO SHOW UP TO REPAIR ALL THE SPOILED INSIDE

   SEE, 'I WALK ON IN MY DAYS' ON THIS HEALING ROAD, TO BECOME ATTACK-FREE. ON THIS

   ROAD, I KNOW THERE ARE MANY BUMPS, I WILL CONQUER THEM ALL; BY MY INNER POWERS

 

                                                         

 

 

                                    IN MY WILL; TO HEAL MYSELF

 

                                                        

 

                                NO MATTER, HOW LONG, IT IS GOING TO TAKE ME.

                            AS I FEEL SO ISOLATED, IN THIS 'MY SO CAREFUL WORLD'

                        A WORLD WHERE I DREAM, WE ALL WILL CHANGE; OUR WAYS   

                     I KNOW THERE IS SOME IN THE REAL WORLD; WHO UNDERSTAND

                  THAT WE CAN NOT CONTINUE TO DESTROY AS WE ARE ON AN EDGE

                IN MANY PERSONAL LIVES & IN NATURE, TIME HAS COME TO TAKE CARE

             TAKING CARE & RE'NEW OUR WAYS, TO EACH OTHER AND MOTHER EARTH  

 

 

 

              

 

         JUST AS IN MY OWN INNER WORLD, WHERE I EVERYDAY SAY MY; THANKSGIVINGS.  

                                                  Know I have also learned this:

 

 

 

  IT IS A PLACE, WHERE I HAVE COME NEAR THE CREATOR OF ALL THERE IS, I FEEL SO BLESSED

  I FEEL SO LOVED AND SO APPRECIATED I FEEL SO CLOSE TO MOTHER EARTH AND HER PAINS.

  PAINS AND POLLUTION, POISON OR NEGLECT, IS FOR EACH OF US TO SEE AND TO HEAL TOO.

 

 

                   

     

                                                 AND JUST KNOW